Have you ever had a mate, colleague, political foe or family member get so caught up in the online kōrero — the noise of social media, gossip, or headlines — that they start hearing, and over time, through repetitive lies and consistent messaging, begin believing a story designed to tear someone down or harm their image?

Think of it like the positive spin on someone, but in reverse. Imagine two people who were once close. One now faces a barrage of negative sentiment. They scroll and hear rumours — full of lies, abuse and trolling — all crafted to damage the other’s reputation. No amount of reassurance or proof of dishonesty is accepted. What began as white noise becomes possible, then plausible, then almost real, and finally accepted as real.

Over time, the person starts to feel whakamā: shame, embarrassment, confusion and anxiety. The constant negativity seeps into their relationship until it starts to break down. Not because of what’s true — but because of what’s been twisted and spread online.

Sadly, this isn’t rare. It happens in workplaces, whānau, and communities across Wellington. A single cruel message or calculated post can destroy trust, damage reputations, and isolate people from those they love. Whether it’s a jealous ex, a ruthless business rival, or a stranger behind a keyboard, the impact is real — protracted digital vileness and hatred, all delivered with the tap of a screen.

Often the target and the troll have never even met. Abusive messaging is frequently designed to cause maximum reputational damage from behind fake profiles and anonymous accounts.

Here in Wellington, the Digital Harms Act has sparked important kōrero about responsibility and accountability online. People are asking: What are the risks? What are the impacts? Who’s responsible when digital harm crosses the line?

As it stands, the Act is not fit for purpose: abusers hide behind fake profiles, the legislation is vague and poorly drafted, and it lacks real teeth. Because of that, many people don’t take it seriously.

A troll might think they’re safe behind a screen name, but nothing online truly disappears. With digital footprints and AI tracking, nearly everything — from harmful trolling to positive campaigns — can be traced. The internet remembers, for better or worse.

This story isn’t just about one whānau or one troll. It’s about all of us — how we engage online, how we protect one another, and how we rebuild trust when it’s been broken. Digital harm doesn’t stay on the screen; it flows into real lives, real emotions, and real relationships.

As One Network Wellington.live leads conversations around digital wellbeing, it’s worth asking: what kind of online space do we want to build — one that destroys, or one that heals?